Spiritual Names

10.

That's how many names I've collected over my years.

It started with my birth name, obviously, and my mother immediately giving me a nickname that was a shortened version of my legal birth name. Throughout my childhood, that was me. My nickname, and when I was in trouble, my birth name. Typical of anyone really.

When I was in elementary school, my family insisted I be confirmed in their faith, through their church. I knew better than to argue, so I agreed. As part of confirmation, I was allowed to choose another name; one that would come between my legal middle and last names. I chose a name that, looking back, almost foreshadowed the struggles and trauma of my adulthood.

In my angsty pre-teen and teenage years, I took on four different nicknames. All vastly different than any name I had before, they were based on the social media screen names of that awkward chapter of life. Two of which were quite dark, and no one calls me by now, virtual or otherwise. The other two, only a handful of people still call me by, even though one is displayed on my own Facebook profile as a nickname. Every once in a while, I fall back to this name when I wish to keep my legal identity confidential.

As an adult, I found that more and more people confused the nickname my mother originally gave me, with a wrong variation of the name. This seemed to be the issue with most phone conversations, as phones can be hard to hear through sometimes, and most of the time people just don't pay attention. In college, this was actually the name of a close friend, and we frequently confused professors and students, and ended up being identified by our last names, or together as "the twins." Our first names were just to similar. Outside of college, my name was still confused with similar sounding/spelled names, and my father ended up introducing me by an even shorter nickname of my original nick name. My name went from 9 letters, down to 6, and then down to 4. It was easier for people to correctly hear a one syllable nickname. So it stuck because of pure convenience.

This blog sparked another name. When creating it, I was at a point in my life where I was so far into the broom closet, that I needed a name that wouldn't even hint at a specific gender. I needed to be completely anonymous, but still real and plausible. I chose the name "Sam." It could be short for "Samantha," or "Samual." In reality, I chose it because I was going by "SamhainGirl" online, and it was a nod at the start of my pagan journey. Samhain is the anniversary of my self-discovery as a witch and when I decided to walk a pagan path.

It seemed right. I even went so far as to say it was my "spiritual name." After all, it was the name I was associating with my spiritual path. I even had a few people who I trusted and had assisted me in some way on my path, call me Sam. I told myself that this was it. This was my spiritual name, the end.

But what is a spiritual name?

Well, first off let me clarify. I'm talking about a spiritual name as in a magical name, or a "pagan name." Its a name that is usually adopted upon initiation into witchcraft. Personally, and I tend to call my witchcraft and pagan path a "spiritual journey" I use the phrasing "spiritual name."

Call it what you will.

Usually adopted at initiation, the name can either be given or selected, and is usually only revealed through a ritual setting. Most often, the name isn't used outside of covens or close pagan friendship circles. I've heard that some pagans use two names, one for public use, and the other used only within rituals/covens.

Is it mandatory to have a spiritual/pagan name? Certainly not! It's really up to the individual.

Can you change your spiritual/pagan name? I mean, yeah, but you definitely shouldn't change it on a whim, and therefore shouldn't choose it on a whim either. Do some research and soul searching first. What all is associated with the name you're interested in? What are positive traits of the name? Negative? Is it unique to you, or do you just like how it sounds? Ideally, you want to keep this name long term. Right?


Within the past 6 months, "Sam" wasn't cutting it anymore. I just wasn't feeling it. It still provided me with the anonymity I needed, so I let it linger. But another name was in the works. It was growing steadily in the back of my mind. I'm not entirely sure how it got there. I think it was sparked by an online name generator that gave a similar/variant version of the name. But I know that the letter "T" stuck. It sounded right, and soon after, the rest of the name followed that letter in a very fluid manner.

Treya.

I whispered it.

I whispered it late at night, and listened to how it flowed from my mouth; how it felt to say it. I wasn't feeling a sense of excitement about it, or even happiness. And that's what kept telling me that it was right. Sure, it's exciting to find your spiritual name. You should definitely be happy about it. But that shouldn't be the dominating feeling.

I felt calm. Peacefulness. Balance. It was the feeling I so frequently wished to feel. Your spiritual name should be natural, not over energized. It should balance you out.

Seven months later, I looked into the name more.

It means: "one who walks three paths." I wonder if this is related to my own path through paganism. The path of the maiden, the path of the mother, and the path of the crone, perhaps. It shows origination in Hindu culture. I also find it interesting how similar the name is with the name of the goddess Freya. After discovering the name, I had a draw to the Norse path, and am still exploring it. Perhaps the similar name brought me closer to Freya herself?

It seems the most famous person with the name is Terry "Treya" Killam Wilber, who is the subject of her husband's book "Grace and Grit." In the book, her husband illustrates the struggles of his wife's cancer that ultimately took her life.

Treya had always felt her issues revolved around the pressures of doing rather than just being. She tried to find her way back to "the simple pleasure of being and making, not knowing and doing. It feels like coming home!" She said, "immediately it came up for me. To stop trying to be a man. To stop calling myself Terry. To become Treya."

Adding to the reading list, obviously.

I finally have let a couple people know the name. I've changed my name on here. Perhaps Terry Wilber is right. Perhaps this is the start of my inner shift. I most certainly am shifting into my spring season, and I have evolved greatly. As my inner being shifts, and my mind shifts to a new plane of thinking, my outer being will shift as well.

I am interested in this new being. This conscious stardust being. 

This is the beginning of an evolution. This is the beginning of my shift.

Hello. My name is Treya.